It all started one windy day when Granny received a flyer advertising the annual Jamboree. Jamboree time in Acersville got jam lovers especially excited as the best jam makers from all over the country, from near and far gathered together to showcase their most delectable jams.

Granny grinned as she decided to enter her prize winning banana-lade jam. Once home, she got out all her pots and pans along with a truck load of bananas and equal amounts of sugar. The wind teased at her kitchen window and undid the window latch. The wind grinned as it carried the smells of the jam up the mountainside. A Shape who was resting in the long mountain grass smelt the jam, and jumped to its feet!

Now nobody really knows very much about Shapes except that they are one of Acersville’s funniest species, known for their monkey-like behaviour and strangely shaped bodies. They live high up on mount Peakmore and generally don’t come down the mountain, except on rare occasion and today was such an occasion!

The Shape stuck out its head and gave a mighty sniff. It could smell bananas and better yet, Granny’s freshly brewed banana-lade jam! Soon all of the shapes who lived ontop of Mount Peakmore had begun sniffing the wonderous smell of Granny’s jam. Then one by one they began hopping down the side of the mountain as if overcome by some force, compelled to go and seize the jam for themselves!

The Shapes made their way down the mountainside and toward Granny’s home. Now if you know anything about Shapes, you will know that they absolutely have no manners at all.  The How-wheeler monkeys rolled like wheels all over the place killing the neatly planted flowers along the streets.

Leechie shook her paw at them, “You, you villans!” she shouted angrily at them, but they took no notice, none of them did, especially not the Band of Square-illas who had hopped exciteably all the way toward Loopie Hall, followed closely by the Triangle Tangs.

The Babmoons rocked violently on their crescent shaped backs, knocking everyone in their way clean off their feet.

It was a disaster! A complete fiasco! It was so bad that no-body could go out onto the street for fear of coming close to a Shape and being knocked down or rolled over.

Now of all the Loopies in Acresville, none was braver than The Flame. The Flame was better known to the Loopies as Spoof, the quiet and reserved store owner from Spruce Street. He lived a quiet life and nobody would have ever suspected him of being a super hero in his spare time, none excpet for Rufus, Ruff and a few others in Acesrville, but that’s another story entirely! Now on this particular windy and chaotic day, Spoof looked out of his window to find Acersville in ruins. The Shapes had left no stone unturned in their desparate persuit of Granny’s jam.

“Something has to be done!” shouted Mayor Piney to the few Loopies who had braved the mayhem had gathered together in Loopie Hall for the Jamboree.

“But what?” asked Giligan nervously, who secretly wished he had brought along his security blanket, for fear of its safety of course.

“I don’t know, but something!” cried the perplexed Mayor who had to dive beneath a nearby table to avoid being kicked by a Triangle Tang who had been swinging from the light fittings.

“Leave it to me.” thought Spoof as he raced home to put on his Flame disguise.

The Shapes continued to raid Acersville eager to find the jam that had got them so excited in the first place. Petrified Loopies had hid themselves in their homes, with Shapes banging wildly at their doors and trying to enter through the windows.

Suddenly and out of nowhere the Flame came whooshing past! With such speed that the Shapes stopped what they were doing to take a look. As he whooshed the Shapes noticed he had covered his cape in banana-lade jam! Jolly good Flame that’ll get their attention!

The Shapes stopped, smelled the jam and raced after the Flame who ran dripping through the streets! The Shapes followed wildly in pursuit and forgot about Acersville almost instantly. Luckily for Spoof, he could run extra fast and he outran the Shapes with such speed that the jam had difficulty clinging to his cape! Spoof ran all the way back up the mountain, with the Shapes close behind.

The Loopies clapped and cheered.

“Three cheers for The Flame! Hooray!” they shouted.

Later at the Jamboree, Rustaberry was given a gold medal for his Topical Coconut Jam which he’d brought all the way from the Island of Not. But Rustaberry was not the only one to receive a gold medal! Mayor Piney issued the Flame with a gold medal too for the bravery he’d shown in leading the Shapes back to their homes on the mountain side!

That night Spoof smiled as he looked at his gold medal. He chuckled as he thought about those naughty Shapes and tired from the day’s activities, soon fell fast asleep. The moon smiled down on him gently and it watched the Shapes too, as they lay outstretched on the grassy mountainside dreaming of the day’s events and especially Granny’s banana-lade!

Goodnight Spoof, a super hero you are indeed, and may you be close by always, well at least wherever banana-lade jam can be found!

© 2010 Ingrid Holtshausen. All rights reserved.

You can look forward to reading : The Jamboree and The Birthday Party

Two excellent new stories, with new characters! Meet Fireman Andy and Rustaberry from the Island of Not

“Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!”

The yells were coming from the Sea Rouge, deep at the bottom of the ocean, where the Pirates lived. It was Patch who seemed to be having some trouble with his beloved gold tooth. He was yelling so loudly and wriggling about so much that Wallace could hardly have a look at what was troubling the captain.

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He was leaving for the Race meeting where Mayor Piney would be announcing the theme of this year’s race for all the Loopies wanting to enter. Every year the theme would change, last year the theme of the race was Birds. Toffee chuckled as he remembered his big chicken car driving over the finish line, covering the crowd in a great flurry of feathers. Mayor Piney had been coughing up feathers for a week after that!

Toffee rounded the corner and joined the other Loopies already there eagerly awaiting Mayor Piney’s announcement.

Mayor Piney finally arrived in his big limousine and walked into the centre of the crowd of Loopies, eating a big salami sandwich.

“This year,” he spluttered between chews,

“I’ve decided that the theme,” he continued at he took another bite of his lunch.

“of the race should be food.”

The Loopies smiled as the Mayor waddled off enjoying his sandwich as he went.

“Food,” thought Toffee.

Toffee thought and thought, what type of food car could he possibly build that would beat every other car that entered into the race? Toffee thought a little more and then chuckled to himself as he strolled home. He had an idea, a very wobbly idea in fact, but it would maybe just work!

A few weeks later, the Loopies gathered for the big Car Race.

All the Loopies who had entered drove their food car creations to the starting line. Mango and Sherbet, the twins of Acersville arrived with a sandwich bicycle car. Granny had helped them to paint the wheels of their car with her prize winning Banana-lade jam.

“It will help you stick to the road.” She explained as she slopped it on in huge dollops.

Next to the twins was Pilot’s hot dog car. He was very proud of his car and drove it slowly to the starting line, being very careful not to splash tomato sauce and mustard all over the road as he idled it along gently.

Behind Pilot was Toffee. The twins snickered and giggled from their sandwich perch as they saw his car, it was made entirely of jelly! Toffee waved at the twins and wobbled his car a little to make them laugh out loud. After Toffee was Crumpet’s Banana-spilt car, complete with whipped cream and lashings of chocolate sauce. Behind Crumpet were the Pirates and Wusky in their run barrel car, singing merrily and jo-ho-hoing!

“Ladies and gentlemen!” boomed Mayor Piney’s voice over the microphone.

“It seems we have a late entry.”

As he announced this Cabbage and Brussel-Sprout, the two naughtiest Loopies in Acersville rolled their cabbage motor-cycle to the starting line.

They nodded at Toffee and the other race entrants with naughty gleams in their eyes.

“Start your engines!” boomed the Mayor’s voice.

The robotic lights at the starting line flashed red then yellow and then green.

“And they’re off!” yelled Piney at the top of his voice as the Loopies and their food cars sped off.

Mango and Sherbet raced off, getting into the lead, but as they entered the woods the leaves and twigs littering the pathway stuck to their jam spread wheels! The banana-lade lathered wheels were so sticky, that they became caked in dry leaves in no time, causing the twins to go slower and slower until they stopped! The other racers cheered as they sped past the twins’ sandwich car.

“It will take forever to scrape this amount of junk off our wheels!” exclaimed Mango peering down to have a look.

“So I guess this means we’re out of the race?” asked Sherbet looking disappointed. Mango nodded and then took a bite out of his sandwich car. The twins giggled as they began munching their food car in the middle of the woods.

The race continued for the other Loopie racers as the race track went round a bend towards the mountain. Cabbage chuckled as she looked over her shoulder, the judges couldn’t see her anymore so she signaled her brother to carry out their naughty plan. Brussel-Sprout lifted a cabbage leaf on the back of their car and two hungry hyenas lept out of the Cabbage car and onto the race track.

The hungry hyenas raced towards Pilot’s hotdog car and began munching it up!! Pilot couldn’t believe his eyes as the two hungry dogs ate his car while he was riding in the race! They spotted Crumpet’s Banana-split car next and quick as a flash ate up her car too. Crumpet was cross. She shook her fist at Cabbage and Brussel-Sprout who were laughing and left her and Pilot in a puff of their smelly cabbage car fumes!

Soon Cabbage and Brusel-Sprout caught up to Wusky and the Pirates and past them too, now it was only Toffee that they had to get in front of to win the race. But Toffee was too far ahead and whizzed over the finish line, followed by an angry Cabbage and a not-so-happy-Brussel-Sprout. Last to finish were the Pirates, who were so jolly by now after drinking so much rum that they didn’t mind who won the race!

The Mayor smiled as he handed a shiny gold trophy to Toffee. Cabbage and Brussel-Sprout edged closer hoping to get some sort of second prize. The Mayor only looked them up and down and said,

“No one likes cheaters, or cabbages for that matter.”

The Loopies laughed. Toffee smiled and hugged his trophy, his silly plan had worked. His wobbly car had won the race!

© 2008 Ingrid Holtshausen. All Rights Reserved.

Download “The Wobbly Car” PDF Document

“Are you sure it’s the Christmas star Mango?” asked Sherbet.

“I’m not sure but I think so! It’s too bright not to be” he shrugged.

Just then they heard a crash! They looked up and to their amazement they saw Santa Clause! His sleigh had just come crashing down onto a nearby roof.

“Oh, ho-no!” cried Santa.

“Rudolph, it must be that nose of yours sonny!”

Rudolph looked at Santa and then shook his head and peered down to have a look at where they had landed. It was then that he spotted the Loopies looking up at him and Santa and the crash landed sleigh. Santa peered down to, to see what had caught Rudolph’s attention and he saw the Loopies too, looking up at him with gaping jaws.

Santa blushed, “Shouldn’t you be in bed?”

The Loopies just continued to stare.

“In all my years of delivering presents,” he said as he began climbing off the roof.

“I’ve never been spotted once! Until now that is!” he said with a twinkle in his eye.

“So you really are Santa?” asked Tubblie in surprise.

“Who’d you think I was, Billy the Kid?” he said with a jolly laugh.

“Not so! Yur beard is too white for ye ta be going by a name like kid.” said Patch.

Santa starred at Patch, “Is he for real? Or have I just entered into a time warp and gone back to Halloween?”

Santa looked very confused.

“Why did you crash Santa?” asked Sherbet in dismay.

“I dunno, I really think I may have hit a time warp as we were following The Star.” He replied, still trying to understand why Patch was dressed up in a Pirate suit.

“He really is a Pirate Mr. Clause!” said Wusky helping to clear Santa’s confusion.

“One of my closest friends too, along with his piratey crew Wallace and Woody here.” He pointed to the other pirates hidden among the other Loopies of Acersville. They had all been on their way home from Granny’s house after their annual Christmas Eve Dinner trying to spot the Christmas Star.

“And you certainly didn’t hit a time warp, our very own Professor Astro would have been aware of that I can assure you!” explained Rufus, as he slapped the Professor on the back.

“You said you were following the Star?” asked Mango, very interested to learn more about Santa’s Christmas travels.

“Yes! You see that very bright, very pointy one, high up there?” he asked.

“Mango! It is the one you spotted, bravo!” cried Sherbet who was very proud of her brother!

“Well done! Maybe I should down load your GPS system and give it to Rudolph; it might make it easier tracking the Star next year.”

Santa edged toward Mango and tugged his nose. Mango giggled.

“What are you doing that for?” he asked.

“Where do you keep your GPS? Rudolph has his in his nose.” He replied.

The Loopies grinned a little. They thought Santa was very funny.

“We don’t have GPS systems but we could always repair Rudolph’s one for you?” offered Rufus.

“Would you be able to do that?” asked Santa a little surprised.

Professor Astro grinned at Rufus.

“Of course, don’t worry a second longer!” replied the Professor, excited at the fact that his scientific knowledge could help at such an important time.

“Well we’ll have to hurry we only have 6 hours till everyone wakes up to open their presents on Christmas morning and my reindeer are fresh out of Brandy.” said Santa.

“Brandy?” said Tubblie, his eyes getting their naughty Tubblie gleam.

“Yes, it keeps them warm in the cold winter air and helps them to run faster so we can deliver all the presents on time. I’m already way off schedule!” he said grimly, looking at his watch.

“We’ll soon have you on your way! Mango and Sherbet, take Santa for Mince pies at Granny’s and we’ll sort out the rest!” said Rufus, eager to get started on repairing Rudolph’s GPS.

So the twins excitedly showed Santa the way to Granny’s house while the other Loopies set to work on fixing Santa’s sleigh and repairing Rudolph’s nose!

The Loopies worked so fast, in no time at all Santa’s sleigh was ready to leave Acersville.

“Here you go Santa.” said Leechie handing the jolly man a remote control.

“That’s for turning Rudolph’s GPS on and off.” explained Rufus.

“I have fitted the GPS with an extra magnet so it’s pull toward the Star will be stronger.” smiled Astro as he patted Rudolph on the nose.

“You’ve all been so kind.” Smiled Santa as a small tear formed in his eye, he then bent down to give them each a gift.

“Now those are for Christmas morning, and sorry I couldn’t place them under your trees and in your stockings, but you do understand, the sun’s nearly up and I still have so many deliveries to make.” He said brushing the tear away with his red glove.

The Loopies nodded and thanked Santa for their gifts.

“Now!” he said taking a deep breath to settle his emotions.

“Who was it that spotted the Christmas Star?” he said smiling a jolly smile.

Mango raised his hand slowly.

“Well then hop aboard son, don’t you want to see it up close?”

Mango could hardly believe it! Santa had chosen him to ride in his sleigh on Christmas Eve!

Mango climbed up and sat on the velvety seat and breathed in the Christmas smells of Santa’s sleigh. It was like being in a Chocolate factory that made gingerbread cookies too! Mango’s experience was interrupted when Santa said, “Don’t you have a sister son?”

“Huh, oh, yes! Yes I do, her name is Sherbet.” blushed Mango.

“Well then Sherbet, up you come too.”

So Sherbet jumped up and ran to the sleigh to join her brother. The twins were so excited!

Santa then took his place at the reigns and cracked his whip.

“On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer, on Vixen!” Santa began calling out all of his reindeer by name. The reindeer began to run, faster and faster, until they were moving at the speed of light.

“Oh my!” smiled Santa, “My reindeer don’t usually run this fast!”

Mango and Sherbet looked at one another and grinned. That Tubblie he must have fed the reindeer his Lighter Fluid from the Brandy Bottle he had handed Granny at dinner! That naughty rascal! But still they couldn’t blame him, it was the best way to get the reindeer to run extra fast to help Santa get back on schedule with his present delivering! So on they rode over the frosty sky all the while getting nearer and nearer to the Christmas Star.

© 2007 Ingrid Holtshausen. All Rights Reserved.

Download “The Christmas Star” PDF Document

“How will we find the treasure?” asked Wusky excitedly, he’d never gone on a treasure hunt before.
“It’s simple laddie,” replied Patch, “All we need do is build us a mighty Pirate ship and go and fetch it and bring it back here!”
“We won’t be doing any plundering will we?” asked Wusky cautiously.
Patch laughed a hearty laugh, “None at all I promise ye that lad.” Patch crossed his heart.
“Okay then what are we waiting for?” exclaimed Wusky, picking up his hammer.

Patch drew up the plans for the building of the ship and like one man, Woody, Wallace, Wusky and Patch began to build. When they had finished they stood back to admire their handy work.
“What should we call her?” asked Wallace.
“As the newest member of our Piratey crew, let Wusky have the honour in naming the ship.” Replied Patch.
“How about …” Wusky thought aloud, “The Sea Mermaid?”
“Aye! That’ll do!” smiled Patch approvingly.

So they all boarded their new Pirate ship, raised their flag and set sail. Woody climbed to the top of the mast and sat in the crow’s nest with his telescope. It was his job to be the look out. Wallace took his mop and began to swab the deck. Patch took his place at the bridge of the ship as ship’s captain.
“Wallace, bring me that map of yours ya sea dog!” yelled Patch.
“Aye Cap’n!” replied Wallace.
“Nothing like being out to sea, hey Wusky?” said Patch, the wind blowing through his beard.

They sailed for a while, while Patch studied the treasure map. He was then interrupted by a shout from Woody.
“Land ho!” he cried.
Wallace took out his binoculars and looked, sure enough, there it was a huge island. The Pirates and Wusky danced with glee.
“We found her lads!” shouted Patch.
As the Sea Mermaid neared the island, Patch gave the orders.
“Trim the sails and lower the anchor!” he barked.
“Aye, aye Cap’n!” said his crew.

They set down the anchor and the ship swayed gently in the tide. Patch looked at the treasure map.
“Yup, it’s this island for sure Mateys!”
So they took their shovels, got off the ship and waded through the water until they reached the beach.
“X would be marking the spot now.” Explained Patch.
Wusky grinned, Woody’s eyes glinted. They could smell the treasure!

“The map says to take twenty paces to the right.” Instructed Patch. The Loopie pirates followed Patches hand movements and took twenty paces in the direction he was pointing.
“Now it says to take fifty paces towards the Coconut Trees.” Wallace counted out the steps until they were right underneath the biggest tree.
“Now she says ta dig boys! X is where me treasure lies!”
The Loopies were so excited, they began digging ferociously. Sand flew in all directions, until … THUD!

“We’ve found her!” shouted Woody in glee as his shovel hit the chest.
“We sure have!” smiled Wallace, who was proud to have found the map in the first place. They dusted the sand off of the chest and opened the rusty lock with one of Woody’s knives. The chest creeked open, the Pirates danced and Wusky howled, the chest was filled to the brim with chocolate dog biscuits!

They shouted and laughed and threw sand into the air. Wusky did a jig, this was his first treasure he had ever found! Well if you don’t count Patch, Woody and Wallace that is! The Pirates excitedly picked up their prize and loaded it onto their ship. They sailed back to Acersville singing and drinking Rum all the way home!

When they got back, other Loopies from Acersville excitedly ran out to meet them. When the Pirates saw all of the Loopies they decided to share their treasure. The Loopies were delighted! They all enjoyed their shared treasure of chocolate dog biscuits with glasses of milk at Wusky’s Beach Cabana Café, listening to the pirates telling their piratey stories.

Surely these were the kindest Pirates that had ever lived!
Thank you Wusky, Woody, Wallace and Patch!

© 2007 Ingrid Holtshausen. All Rights Reserved.

Download “A Piratey Adventure” PDF Document