It all started one windy day when Granny received a flyer advertising the annual Jamboree. Jamboree time in Acersville got jam lovers especially excited as the best jam makers from all over the country, from near and far gathered together to showcase their most delectable jams.

Granny grinned as she decided to enter her prize winning banana-lade jam. Once home, she got out all her pots and pans along with a truck load of bananas and equal amounts of sugar. The wind teased at her kitchen window and undid the window latch. The wind grinned as it carried the smells of the jam up the mountainside. A Shape who was resting in the long mountain grass smelt the jam, and jumped to its feet!

Now nobody really knows very much about Shapes except that they are one of Acersville’s funniest species, known for their monkey-like behaviour and strangely shaped bodies. They live high up on mount Peakmore and generally don’t come down the mountain, except on rare occasion and today was such an occasion!

The Shape stuck out its head and gave a mighty sniff. It could smell bananas and better yet, Granny’s freshly brewed banana-lade jam! Soon all of the shapes who lived ontop of Mount Peakmore had begun sniffing the wonderous smell of Granny’s jam. Then one by one they began hopping down the side of the mountain as if overcome by some force, compelled to go and seize the jam for themselves!

The Shapes made their way down the mountainside and toward Granny’s home. Now if you know anything about Shapes, you will know that they absolutely have no manners at all.  The How-wheeler monkeys rolled like wheels all over the place killing the neatly planted flowers along the streets.

Leechie shook her paw at them, “You, you villans!” she shouted angrily at them, but they took no notice, none of them did, especially not the Band of Square-illas who had hopped exciteably all the way toward Loopie Hall, followed closely by the Triangle Tangs.

The Babmoons rocked violently on their crescent shaped backs, knocking everyone in their way clean off their feet.

It was a disaster! A complete fiasco! It was so bad that no-body could go out onto the street for fear of coming close to a Shape and being knocked down or rolled over.

Now of all the Loopies in Acresville, none was braver than The Flame. The Flame was better known to the Loopies as Spoof, the quiet and reserved store owner from Spruce Street. He lived a quiet life and nobody would have ever suspected him of being a super hero in his spare time, none excpet for Rufus, Ruff and a few others in Acesrville, but that’s another story entirely! Now on this particular windy and chaotic day, Spoof looked out of his window to find Acersville in ruins. The Shapes had left no stone unturned in their desparate persuit of Granny’s jam.

“Something has to be done!” shouted Mayor Piney to the few Loopies who had braved the mayhem had gathered together in Loopie Hall for the Jamboree.

“But what?” asked Giligan nervously, who secretly wished he had brought along his security blanket, for fear of its safety of course.

“I don’t know, but something!” cried the perplexed Mayor who had to dive beneath a nearby table to avoid being kicked by a Triangle Tang who had been swinging from the light fittings.

“Leave it to me.” thought Spoof as he raced home to put on his Flame disguise.

The Shapes continued to raid Acersville eager to find the jam that had got them so excited in the first place. Petrified Loopies had hid themselves in their homes, with Shapes banging wildly at their doors and trying to enter through the windows.

Suddenly and out of nowhere the Flame came whooshing past! With such speed that the Shapes stopped what they were doing to take a look. As he whooshed the Shapes noticed he had covered his cape in banana-lade jam! Jolly good Flame that’ll get their attention!

The Shapes stopped, smelled the jam and raced after the Flame who ran dripping through the streets! The Shapes followed wildly in pursuit and forgot about Acersville almost instantly. Luckily for Spoof, he could run extra fast and he outran the Shapes with such speed that the jam had difficulty clinging to his cape! Spoof ran all the way back up the mountain, with the Shapes close behind.

The Loopies clapped and cheered.

“Three cheers for The Flame! Hooray!” they shouted.

Later at the Jamboree, Rustaberry was given a gold medal for his Topical Coconut Jam which he’d brought all the way from the Island of Not. But Rustaberry was not the only one to receive a gold medal! Mayor Piney issued the Flame with a gold medal too for the bravery he’d shown in leading the Shapes back to their homes on the mountain side!

That night Spoof smiled as he looked at his gold medal. He chuckled as he thought about those naughty Shapes and tired from the day’s activities, soon fell fast asleep. The moon smiled down on him gently and it watched the Shapes too, as they lay outstretched on the grassy mountainside dreaming of the day’s events and especially Granny’s banana-lade!

Goodnight Spoof, a super hero you are indeed, and may you be close by always, well at least wherever banana-lade jam can be found!

© 2010 Ingrid Holtshausen. All rights reserved.

It had been a long time since Granny had been away on holiday. She missed the sea air and decided to do something about it. So she packed her bags, took her toothbrush and was just about to leave when, “Meoooooow!” it was Linky, her cat.

“Oh deary me, I’ve forgotten about you Linky.” said Granny, bending down to stroke the ginger animal. Just then she caught sight of Scales, her gold fish. Oh bother now she was really in a pickle. She couldn’t go away, she had to look after her pets!

Granny sat down in her favourite chair, to think about what to do.

Coo-coo-awk-awk-coo-coo-jolly good-awk!

“What on earth is that noise?” thought Granny as she got up to have a look.

It was Professor Astro, he was the nuttiest Loopie in Acersville! He wore thick glasses and was always coming up with new inventions! The Professor saw Granny peering out of her window at him. He grinned and waved at her, motioning for her to open the door.

“Hallo Granny!” he smiled, looking very pleased with himself.

“Good morning Astro, what have you there?” she asked.

“It’s my newest invention!” he smiled proudly, “It’s a Parrot-Cuckoo Alarm Clock!”

Granny looked puzzled, “What does it do?” she asked.

“Well, it’s pretty neat if you need to remind yourself what to do next.” The Professor looked at Linky, “Like perhaps feeding the cat?”

“Oh!” said Granny, smiling brightly. “That sounds like a perfect invention, and I know just how you can test it!”

She quickly explained that she had been deciding to take a vacation and couldn’t go because she had pets to look after, but now with Astro’s invention, all that could change!

“I’d be happy to look after your house and pets while you’re away Granny!” said Astro.

“Good! Let me quickly write you a list of all the things that need to be done around the house each day, and then you can set your invention to remind you!” Granny was twitching with excitement.

“What a wonderful plan.” beamed Astro.

Granny wrote out a long list, placed it on the kitchen counter, picked up her bags and waved to the Professor, “See you in a week!” she called and was soon out of sight.

The Professor smiled and stroked Linky.

“Looks like it’s just you, me and Scales for the next few days.”

“Awk! And me! Coo-coo!” said the alarm clock.

The Professor smiled, what a good invention he had made! He quickly went to work setting his Parrot-Cuckoo Alarm Clock to remind him about his tasks for the next few days.

The next day the Professor was woken early by the squawking of his clock.

“Make the tea! Awk, make the tea! Coo-coo! Coo-coo!”

The Professor rubbed his eyes and got out of bed, he stumbled down to the kitchen, without his glasses!

The Professor reached for the tea bags and hot water, but without his glasses he was as blind as a bat! He knocked over the kettle, which sent boiling water all over the kitchen! The boiling water spilled onto Granny’s list dissolving half of her writing!

“Awk! Not good! Coo-coo!” screamed the alarm clock.

“It’s alright, quite alright.” said the Professor dabbing up the water with a soft cloth.

“You’re programmed to let me know when I have to do things, remember?”

But the professor had forgotten that he needed the list to tell him other things he hadn’t programmed into the Parrot-Cuckoo Alarm Clock!

“Coo-coo, coo-coo! Awk, whistle, awk, time for the laundry, wash the clothes, whistle!”

The Professor looked pleased with himself.

“See, was that so difficult? You have all the information right up there.” He said pointing to the Parrot’s head.

The Professor busily went about collecting dirty clothes and sheets. He stuffed them all inside the washing machine until he couldn’t stuff anymore.

“Now, how many scoops of washing power do we need?” he asked the alarm clock.

“Awk!” squawked the Parrot looking at Granny’s frumpled list.

“Oh dear!” said the Professor, “it looks like we needed the list after all!”

‘Oh well, drastic measures call for drastic action! Let’s make it five scoops! Then it will be all nice, fluffy and clean.”

So the Professor began loading scoops of washing powder into the machine. He then hurried off with his Parrot-Cuckoo Alarm Clock to finish the other tasks set for the day, while the washing machine washed. The washing machine swished and swashed and swished and swashed until….

KERSWALLOOSH! SPLASH SPLISH!

The washing machine door popped off and all the sheets and clothes flopped in a soapy mess onto the floor. But the machine kept washing!

Wish-wash-wish. Wish-swash-swish it went, making more and more and more bubbles from the many scoops of soap powder the Professor had used!

But that wasn’t the only disaster of the day! Without his glasses or Granny’s list, the Professor had managed to turn Granny’s entire house on it’s head! He fed the cat fish food and poured milk in the fish bowl, he vacuumed the roses and watered the carpets. He boiled the ironing for dinner and folded the peas! Poor Granny! She was going to come home to such a mess!

By this time the bubbles had made their way out into the street! And the machine kept on washing. Wish-wash-swish-wash-wish-wash-wish!

“Hallo?” asked Rufus as he and Ruff had passed the bubbly mess.

“What’s this?”

“It looks like a whole lot of soapy bubbles to me.” said Ruff.

“Indeed! But this means someone is having a party without us! C’mon!” he replied, taking Ruff’s hand and dragging him to find the source of the bubbles.

Rufus and Ruff reached Granny’s house, which by this time was completely hidden from sight underneath all the washing foam.

“Awk! Whistle, tap the bath! Tap the bath! Coo-coo!” Came the muffled sounds of a Parrot’s voice from underneath the bubbles.

Rufus looked at Ruff, who shrugged.

“Maybe Granny has a new pet?” he offered.

“Only one way to find out!” said Rufus heading straight into the bubbles.

“La-la-li-tra-la-la!” It was the Professor, he looked quite funny without his glasses!

“Professor! Professor!” shouted Rufus, trying to shout loudly over the sounds of the vacuum and the Professor’s singing.

“What’s that?” the Professor turned.

“Oh, Rufus, what’s this you’ve brought with you?” he asked.

“It’s my brother Ruff Professor, you know who he is?” answered Rufus, not realizing that Ruff had been completely covered with bubbles on their way in.

“But then why does he look like that? Is it Halloween already?”

“Professor, turn off the vacuum! What are you doing to Granny’s house?” instructed Ruff who had had quite enough at this stage.

“Well..” said the Professor, obviously flustered at the unexpected interruption.

The Professor explained that Granny was away on holiday and that he was looking after her house using his latest invention, his Parrot-Cuckoo Alarm Clock.

“Professor, I think your alarm is broken.” Retorted Ruff looking at the house riddled with disaster.

“Quite the contrary, Ruff!” said the Professor proudly.

“Look at all the things I’ve been able to do for Granny. Why, my alarm is in perfect working order!”

Rufus quickly handed the Professor his glasses and with that the Professor’s face fell. His thick bottle-tops revealed what Rufus and Ruff had been trying to tell him.

“Egad! Good Heavens! This place is a mess! Someone should really clean it up!”

He looked at the brothers, a grave expression crossing his face, as he realized he couldn’t do it alone.

“No problems Professor!” Rufus answered Astro’s unasked question.

“We’ll get this place straight in no time!”

And with that the three Loopies began cleaning, tidying and straightening out Granny’s house. In no time at all Granny’s house was back to normal and ready for her return.

“Thank you Ruff and Rufus!” said a relieved Professor.

“It’s no problem Professor, really.” smiled Rufus.

“But before we go.” added Ruff, “There’s just one last thing we must do!”

With that he took the Professor’s Parrot-Cuckoo Alarm Clock and set it to remind Astro of one more task.

The brothers waved good night to the Professor and headed off home. The Professor was so tired he flopped onto the couch and fell into a deep sleep. In the morning he was again woken by the squawking of his alarm clock, but this time it had a different message:

“Awk, wear your glasses! Don’t forget your glasses! Coo-coo!”

© 2007 Ingrid Holtshausen. All Rights Reserved.

Download “Granny Goes Away” PDF Document

Tubblie was the practical joker of Acersville. He couldn’t go anywhere without spraying someone with water or setting whoopie cushions down where they were going to sit. He was a real menace!

This time he had given Chelsea a gift. It was a box, wrapped in beautiful pink paper with a pretty bow on the lid. She was so pleased, that she opened it immediately and a giant springy snake jumped out at her!

“Aaaaaah!” She screamed.

Chelsea burst into tears while Tubblie went off laughing.

Chelsea was the friendliest Loopie in all Acersville. She was kind and always thought the best of anyone. Chelsea was one of the few Loopies left in Acersville that would still give Tubblie a chance. Most of the others were already wise to his tricks.

“What’s wrong?” asked Leechie softly. She was out on her morning walk and noticed Chelsea looking rather upset.

“I’m so angry at Tubblie,” She blurted.

“Oh dear, what did he do this time?”

“He gave me a present, with a big snake inside.” Chelsea sobbed.

“I feel so stupid for thinking Tubblie could ever have meant to be kind.”

Leechie took Chelsea’s paw and smiled. “I know who can help us, come with me.”

They went to see Ruff and Rufus and explained all that Tubblie had done.

Rufus grinned, “Leave it to us.”

“What are we going to do Rufus?” asked Ruff puzzled.
“You’ll see!”

The next day Rufus and Ruff invited Tubblie over to their house.

“We have made a present for you Tubblie.” explained Rufus, pointing to a large covered object in the middle of the yard.

“What is it?” cried Tubblie excitedly.

“Go have a look.”

“Oh boy!” Tubblie ran towards the object and lifted the cloth that covered it. “It’s a robot! Quite a strange looking one too!”

“A Bahena.” said Ruff, trying hard not to laugh.

Rufus thumped him in the ribs.

“A Ba-what?” asked Tubblie, looking very interested.

“It’s a mixture between a Baboon and a Hyena. It’s programmed to laugh at jokes and to beat up bad guys.” explained Rufus.

Tubblie smiled slyly.

“Thanks. You guys are the best.”

Tubblie said hurried goodbyes as he rolled his new present away. “I can’t wait to test you out Bahena.” he whispered to the robot, “And I have just the plan!”

Tubblie rolled his Bahena behind some bushes and hid himself behind a tree not far away. He saw Granny on her way down the path carrying her shopping home.

“Watch this Bahena. Here comes your first joke for the day.” giggled the naughty Tubblie.

“Waaaaaaa!” he screamed as he jumped out in front of Granny.

Suddenly and without any warning, the Bahena jumped out from behind the bushes and began to beat Tubblie over the head with a stick.
Granny laughed and laughed. Tubblie looked so funny dancing all over the park with a whatever-you-call-it behind him.

Granny laughed so much that she dropped her shopping and collapsed in a heap on the ground. The tears rolled down her cheeks, she spluttered, coughed and could hardly breathe.

“Thank you Tubblie!” she cried, when she managed to straighten herself and pick up all of her groceries. “That was the best laugh I’ve had in years!”

Tubblie didn’t hear Granny. He was just trying to scramble away from his Bahena.

Eventually the beating stopped. Tubblie rubbed his head. It was aching.

“What was that for Bahena?” he cried, “You were supposed to laugh at my joke, not beat me up. Probably a start-up malfunction or something. Come on, I’ve got another idea.”

So off went Tubblie in search of another victim with the Bahena trailing behind him.

“Ahh!” said Tubblie excitedly. “Here’s someone now.”

It was George. George had been the Postmaster of Acersville since Tubblie was a pup.

George had a lot of deliveries to make and the day wasn’t getting any longer.

Tubblie ran out in front of George and grabbed some letters out of his hands and ran off. But he didn’t get quite the reaction he had wanted. George looked at Tubblie and grinned. “You can be my little helper if you want, you just have to promise to wear a tiny green uniform.”

Tubblie was horrified. He was no elf! Just then, the Bahena laughed. It was first muffled and then it got louder and louder.

“Hey, wait a minute!” said Tubblie, getting quite furious, “You’re supposed to laugh at my jokes!”

He got so angry that he pulled the Bahena’s head off and to his surprise…

“Leechie! Chelsea! You were the Bahena?!”

“Yes.” They giggled, “You’re so funny Tubblie, especially when you’re angry.”

“I don’t like it when Loopies laugh at me, or beat me with sticks or make a fool out of me!” shouted Tubblie.

“Now you know how we feel most of the time Tubblie.” said Chelsea.

Tubblie looked down at the ground, “Do I really make you feel that way?” he asked sheepishly.

“Yes you do.”

“Then I will change.”

And from that day on, Tubblie really did change. He is now the nicest Loopie in Acersville, thanks to Rufus and Ruff’s Bahena!

© 2007 Ingrid Holtshausen. All Rights Reserved.

The smells of Christmas cookies wafted through the air.
“I can’t wait to get to Granny’s tonight to celebrate Christmas Eve!” smiled Sherbet as she licked the cookie icing off her finger.

“Me neither!” replied her brother wrapping another present.
It was Loopie Christmas tradition to go to Granny’s house on Christmas Eve, have a huge dinner, open presents and spend time visiting with all the Loopies of Acersville.

“Blast!” said Patch.
“I canno’ get this present wrapped Mateys!”
Mango and Sherbet giggled. They had agreed to teach the Pirates about Christmas traditions in Acersville and this included sessions in “How to wrap presents” and “Baking Christmas cookies”.
“Here, let’s try again.” said Mango handing Patch a fresh piece of Gift Wrap and a new ribbon.
“Aaaah!” screamed Patch about to pull his hair out with frustration!
“No more lad, enough is enough, Pirates were made to plunder things, not to be giving gifts at Christmas time!”
Wallace sniffed his fresh batch of cookies as he lifted them carefully out of the oven.
“Come on Captain, it’s not so bad, look I made Santa cookies just for you!”
“Aye Captain, and they taste mighty fine too!” said Woody munching a leg off of his Santa cookie.
Patch scowled. He was clearly not impressed.
“Come on, let’s get a bit of fresh air and try something new shall we?” offered Mango, he had an idea. So Patch and Mango left the cottage, leaving Wallace, Woody and Sherbet to bake and gift wrap to their hearts content!

Rounding the bend they got to Tubblie’s house. Tubblie was home, you could tell by the naughty giggles that were coming from his garden! Mango smiled at Patch, motioning him to open Tubblie’s gate. Patch was a little confused but welcomed the change in plans, he was adamant never to gift wrap another present ever again in his life and Santa cookies … well lets just say he would eat them, but not bake them!

Tubblie’s gate creaked, sending a bucket full of water tumbling down and emptying itself over Patch!
“Arg!” mumbled Patch who was soaked right through.
“Oops!” winced Mango, who wasn’t deliberately trying to frustrate the all ready on-edge Pirate Captain.
“I forgot about Tubblie’s doorbell!”
“Aaaah! Visitors!” exclaimed Tubblie as he came forward to greet them. He was the practical joker of Acersville so it made sense that his house would be rigged with all sorts of unexpected surprises!
“What brings you here on this fine, fine Christmas Eve!” Tubblie just sounded naughty. He was definitely up to something, just as Mango had suspected.
“Sherbet and I have offered to teach the Pirates about our Christmas traditions here in Acersville.” replied Mango.
“I was wondering if you would be able to offer any help?”
Tubblie grinned.
“Can you keep a secret?” he asked, his eyes dancing with anticipation to share something he’d obviously been keeping to himself all afternoon.
“Aye lad, you can trust old Patch, I keep my word.”
Mango nodded in agreement.
“Well alright then, follow me!” Tubblie led them around the corner towards the back of the garden. He pointed towards his Brandy Bottle treasure with great delight and grinned with glee.

“Aren’t ye a little on the young side to be taking up drinking laddie?” asked Patch looking a little worried.
Mango only grinned, waiting for Tubblie’s explanation.
“My dear Patch, Brandy isn’t just for drinking at Christmas time here in Acersville.” said Tubblie walking over and placing his arm around Patch’s shoulder.
“We use it to make trifle and Christmas pudding too!”

Mango’s eye lit up. Everyone in Acersville knew that Granny would begin making her special trifle and plum pudding early in the morning for their annual Christmas Dinner that night. It was a Loopie tradition for Granny to light the Plum pudding after dinner and bring it into the dinning room in all its flaming glory!
“And because this is your first Christmas in Acersville, I’ve taken it upon myself to enhance the Christmas Festivities this year. And that my friends; is how this specific Brandy bottle fits in!” Tubblie’s eyes danced once more.

“But how?” asked Mango in amazement.
“I stole it from Granny!” Tubblie confessed and then broke out into fits of laughter.
“But now how is Granny supposed to light the Plum pudding without any Brandy?” asked Mango crossly. The Loopies would be very disappointed if Tubblie had gone and ruined the very high light of Christmas Eve in Acersville! No flaming pudding? What a disaster that would be!
“You’ll see! You’ll soon see!” Tubblie just giggled all the more and ushered them out of the gate.

Soon it was time to go to Granny’s house for the Christmas dinner. The Loopies got themselves washed and dressed and headed off armed with colourful presents and enough ice-cream to sink a small ship!
“Come in, come in!” smiled Granny in her most welcoming voice. She seated the Loopies at the table and proceeded to serve the Christmas food. After the Loopies had finished eating they looked at Granny expectantly for the grand finale of the evening!
“Should we eat the pudding before we open the presents?” asked Granny as she usually did each year, just to built a little more onto the already mounting anticipation.
“Yes!” grinned the Loopies, hardly able to contain their excitement.
It was then that Mango darted a glaring scowl in Tubblie’s direction!
“Well then I’ll go and get it.”
“Let me help you Granny.” said the naughty Tubblie grinning back at Mango.
“Why thank you Tubblie, that is very kind of you.” She said and the two of them headed into the kitchen.
“Granny, I was thinking, wouldn’t it be more spectacular this year, especially for the Pirates, if you would pour the Brandy over the pudding at the table and then light it?”
“Well, I’ve never thought of doing it that way before.” said Granny a little surprised.
“But alright Tubblie, if you think it would make it more spectacular this year, okay then.”

So Granny and Tubblie walked back out of the kitchen armed with a not so flaming pudding and a very suspicious looking Brandy bottle, well at least it looked that way to Patch, who recognized it as the same one he’d seen in Tubblie’s garden that afternoon. Mango almost had a heart attack, but Tubblie motioned him to keep quiet and did something very un-Tubblie like.
“This year I have taken it upon myself to make sure that the Christmas Festivities are extra special!” he explained. “Please would you all put on these special shades before Granny lights the pudding to see what I have planned.”
Tubblie began handing out sunglasses to each of the Loopies present and then handed Granny his Brandy Bottle, which didn’t contain Brandy at all, but Lighter Fluid! He then turned down the lights.

Granny poured the contents of the bottle all over the pudding until it was soaked through. She then took a match and lit the pudding. The pudding glowed with all it’s might as strong as a flame from a blow torch, the Loopies sat back in awe and watched with shielded eyes as the pudding continued to burn and burn. First in brilliant white, then fading to orange and then flickering to yellow, until the lighter fluid had been burnt up and the flames stopped. Of course the pudding was burnt to a crisp and most of the Loopies had singed their eyebrows from the incredible heat, but they all agreed that sacrificing the pudding was a small price to pay for such an incredible fire show.

Later that evening once all the presents had been opened and all the ice-cream had been eaten, the Loopies sat back and thought about what Tubblie’s flaming pudding had taught them. They realized that Christmas was not about their traditions or about basking in the light of a flaming Christmas pudding on Christmas Eve, but about celebrating and remembering the light of a star that once shone on top of a stable one cold night in Bethlehem, marking the birth place of a Mighty King.

The Loopies then folded their Christmas paper, collected their presents and kissed Granny goodnight. As they left Granny’s house they starred up at the sky, determined to find the star that had lit the path to where Jesus lay so many years ago. Rumour has it that Mango was the first to spot it! But that’s another story. One we’ll have to save for next year!

Click here for Story 12 – Part 2 of a Loopie Christmas!

© 2007 Ingrid Holtshausen. All Rights Reserved.